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The Spiritual Life

Thanks for checking out my blog.  All posts are inspired by where my spiritual life is taking me. They are written to inspire and remind myself to apply spiritual tools to my everyday experience, but I have a feeling you will find something useful here too...
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A Complaint Free Me

2/17/2015

1 Comment

 
Back in 2006, Will Bowen launched a movement you may be familiar with.  He challenged people to go 21 consecutive days without a single complaint.  I was aware of this challenge back then and, even though it made sense, I never took up the challenge and the idea faded from my awareness...until today.

I have to admit, I’ve been complaining a lot lately.  I didn’t recognize what I was doing as complaining, but I was.  Complain is defined as “express dissatisfaction or annoyance about a state of affairs or an event.”  Feel frustrated about something?  That’s a silent complaint.  Upset because something isn’t moving as fast as you would like?  Silent complaint.  Any time you focus on what you perceive to be wrong or missing, and your mood or energy degrades, you are engaged in complaining - whether or not it is voiced.  

And that is what I’ve been doing.  I’ve been unconsciously looking at what I think is “wrong” or “missing” or taking “too long,” judging it, and receiving the resulting energy and attitude drain.  Not only that, but my focus on those things as being wrong, missing, etc. has been putting energy into them remaining wrong or missing in my experience.  We create in our experience what we put our attention on and the more we focus on “wrong” or “missing,” the more the creative capacity that birthed the universe says, “Oh, you focus on wrong and missing a lot.  You must want more of that.  Here ya go!”

I’m going be working towards a complaint free me.  Here is how I’m going to practice:
  1. Awareness.  My intention is to be aware of when I’m complaining - not so that I can judge myself a.k.a. complain about my complaining, but to stop.

  2. Self-forgiveness.  At the core of any complaint is a judgment.  “Judge not lest ye be judged” means that you are in control.  You choose to judge, you reap the “rewards” of those judgments and only you can choose to forgive them.  Work with the sentence, “I forgive myself for judging _______ as_______” and follow it up with a statement of Truth.  For example, “I forgive myself for judging this process as taking too long.  The Truth is that divine, harmonious timing is at play right now and all the pieces required for this  process to complete are being put in place as rapidly as possible.”

  3. Visualization.  What is the desired end result?  We often get so caught up in the hows that we forget to focus on what we want.  After I notice myself complaining and do my self-forgiveness, I’m going to spend some time (it doesn’t have to be much, even just a few seconds) visualizing what I want instead.  

  4. This or something better for the Highest Good of all concerned.  Our best visualizing might be a pittance compared to what is available.  Releasing your desire into this idea allows room for ...something even better!  


So, that's how I’m going to practice.  What about you?  Did you participate in the 21-day challenge?  What was the result?  Please share in the comments.  Any other ideas on ways to help going complaint-free?  Share those too!
1 Comment
Mary Shanks
2/17/2015 05:16:48 am

Love it, Ben. There is so much truth here. I too swill strive to be aware of "complaining" and stop it. Great blog!

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