Kindness

The Dalai Lama has been quoted as saying, “My religion is kindness.”  This idea has been at work in me this week.  Kindness.  At first glance it may seem simple.  I’m a kind person. I hold doors for people.  I say “thank you.”  No problem.  Kindness.  Done!  

But wait, I got frustrated with somebody yesterday, and though I was very polite and kind in what I said, I thought some unkind thoughts.  

I told a story this morning about a situation from the night before.  I was complaining.  Complaining about somebody to others, to get them to join you in your judgment is not kind.  

As it turns out, there are plenty of times throughout the day when I am not kind.  If I make a mistake and have to redo something, am I kind to myself or do I drip with sarcasm when I think, “Oh, good job, Ben!”  That isn’t being kind to myself.  What about if while cooking dinner I stir a little too intensely and slosh a bit of sauce out of the pan?  Do I blame the sauce?  “That is exactly what I wanted to happen!  Thank you soooo much, sauce!”  (Come on, you’ve done it too, or something similar.)  Not kind.

So I’m noticing I have a lot more opportunities to be kind than I take advantage of, and noticing is a great thing!  Noticing is the harbinger of change.  Now that I have noticed, I can choose.  I can choose to pay attention more.  I can choose to stop myself and make adjustments.  I can choose to be kind.  I can be a disciple of kindness and learn about myself from the moments when I am kind and those when I find I’m not.  

It goes even deeper than just kindness.  Is kindness violent?  No.  So by being kind, I’m also being non-violent.  Is kindness beautiful?  Absolutely.  By being kind, I bring more beauty into the world.  Is kindness healing?  Compassion is certainly healing and is not compassion the kind thing when someone is suffering?  

So what can you do today to be a little more kind?  Talk to yourself in a different tone.  Catch yourself in a judgment and stop and forgive.  Make eye contact when you say “thank you.”  Smile a little more.  There are so many ways to engage in a kindness practice.  So how about it?  How about a kindness practice?  What might happen in your life if you had a conscious practice of kindness?  Think about it.  Feel into it.  Follow the Good!